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Welcome To: The Hatch!
March 21, 2021

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Welcome to The Hatch, where the chicks of the Big Chick Energy comedy troupe get together on Friday nights to hang out and do improv!

On this improv podcast you’ll hear lots of wacky stories from the chicks followed by long-form improv scenes that go to absolutely wild and bizarre places!

Hosted by Alicia Carrick, Emily Milling, Jo Anne Tacorda, Julia Jones and Sam Sexton

Make sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel to watch the show with our faces! https://youtube.com/bigchickenergysketch

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Transcript:

The Hatch Trailer

All: [00:00:00] Wing it, baby!  

Alicia: [00:00:02] Talking to my friends and having a good time, 

Emily: [00:00:04] Sipping some wine and talking.  

Jo Anne: [00:00:06] We’re talking. We’re being social 

All: [00:00:09] on The Hatch, 

Sam: [00:00:09] The Big Chick Energy Podcast. 

Emily: [00:00:11] That’s what you’re listening 

to right now. it’s The Hatch that you’re listening to right now! 

Alicia: [00:00:17] With Alicia, 

Jo Anne: [00:00:17] Jo Anne, 

Sam: [00:00:17] Sam, 

Julia: [00:00:17] Julia 

Emily: [00:00:17] and Emily! 

Alicia: [00:00:18] The Hatch. 

Julia: [00:00:20] Tweet tweet! 

Jo Anne: [00:00:21] Improvise! 

Sam: [00:00:22] Chickety chick! 

Emily: [00:00:22] This is a real treat.

Jo Anne: [00:00:23] I think we nailed it. 

Alicia: [00:00:24] Fun, huh? 

Sam: [00:00:25] That was a full dozen right there. 

Alicia: [00:00:26] I’m a chicken! No, I’m not, I’m a human being! 

Jo Anne: [00:00:29] And scene. 

 Welcome to the hatch, the Big Chick Energy podcast. I’m Jo Anne Tacorda 

Alicia: [00:00:35] I’m alicia Carrick 

Julia: [00:00:36] I’m Julia Jones.

Emily: [00:00:37] I’m Emily Milling. 

Sam: [00:00:39] I’m Sam Sexton. And this podcast you’re listening to right now is an improv social podcast, 

Alicia: [00:00:45] Which means that we’re being social and improvising long-form scenes to entertain you both audio version and with the video on YouTube. 

Julia: [00:00:54] New episodes come out every Friday, starting April 2nd because it’s Easter. And we thought that was appropriate for a podcast called The Hatch. 

Emily: [00:01:00] So make sure you subscribe now on your favorite podcast app to get a weekly dose of Big Chick Energy. 

Jo Anne: [00:01:06] And with that, we take you to a few teasers from our first few episodes.

Emily: [00:01:15] Come get your fortune told Fortune’s $5. I’ll read your palm 

Jo Anne: [00:01:20] I have five dollars. 

Emily: [00:01:22] Oh, come on in darling. Come on in $5. Thank you very much. I’ll just put that right here. Now. Let me see your hands. Let me see our hands in my hands. Okay. Beautiful. Okay. So I can see you’ve got a long, long love line. You’ve got a long love line.

It looks like you’re going to be very happy, but it splits part way. It looks like it’s split in half, which – which tells me you are going to have two big, significant loves. In your life. And the other line here that I see, this is your meat line. Now, many people call this, they think that this is the lifeline, but this is your meat line.

And your meat line tells you what kind of meats you’re actually allergic to and which ones you can handle. And it tells me you’re not allergic to any sort of conventional meats. If you were to eat a human, you would break out into a rash and hives so terrible that everyone would know, you had eaten a human.

So, you know, I mean, this is kind of, this is kind of like utilitarian palm reading, I guess, but it’s just, you know, it’s facts, I think you should know. Anyway. So the rest of the information here tells me, okay. Oh, Oh, 

Oh, your life, your lifeline, the other part of your meat line. It has a pretty sudden stop here.

Jo Anne: [00:02:52] No. 

Emily: [00:02:52] Um, how old are you? 

Jo Anne: [00:02:57] 17. 

Emily: [00:02:58] Oh, well dear, thanks for five bucks! 

Jo Anne: [00:03:03] Dear God! This is only my second year at Lindsay Fair, selling the secret concoction to all the people. And that damn journalist lady keeps asking me questions. I can’t show her my hives or else my livelihood will be gone! If only I had a friend. You remember friends?

Oh my goodness. 

Hello? 

Are you okay? Oh, Oh my goodness. 

Paralysis has stricken this, my client, this terrible, 

Emily: [00:03:43] It’s interesting that I 

Jo Anne: [00:03:45] Don’t look at this! 

Emily: [00:03:46] Stumble upon you again with this poor person you seems to be stricken with paralysis. 

Jo Anne: [00:03:53] Pay no mind to this person over here. 

Emily: [00:03:55] Well, I just, you know, I just ran into a young child who, who happened to lost their, their parent.

And I was wondering, you know, we were looking for her earlier. Did she ever find her parent? 

Jo Anne: [00:04:06] She did. She found them right in the mirror maze. And it was all fine. 

Emily: [00:04:10] Did she find her in your meat grinder? 

Jo Anne: [00:04:15] AHH! 

Emily: [00:04:16] So you admit it, then.

Jo Anne: [00:04:17] I said, what? I am just as shocked as you are! 

Emily: [00:04:21] You know,  reactions speak louder than words. I’ve got a word count to hit. I’ll see you later. 

Jo Anne: [00:04:26] Oh, dear God, my livelihood. 

Julia: [00:04:30] They made my bag again to try and find my mom, jen, Jenna and I, my name is Jenny and you know, like she, she totally found me and she told me to calm down and she was like experiencing all these weird symptoms. So she came to talk to you about it.

I was wondering if you, she came fine too, by the way, she randomly suffers from paralysis. 

So. 

Jo Anne: [00:04:48] Of course not. 

I have not seen your mother. I’m just going to tuck behind this door. You stay here, don’t look anywhere. I’m going to just start cleaning now. 

Julia: [00:05:00] Yeah. You know, it’s really great when strangers just tell kids what to do, because we totally listened because we have this really weird fright of authority and you know, it was just like… 

Sam: [00:05:09] Jenny!

Julia: [00:05:10] Oh mama, why are you itchy?

Sam: [00:05:12] Oh God. Oh, these hives! I Think it’s that damn meat dog I ate.

Julia: [00:05:24] Hello, miss. How are you? 

Sam: [00:05:25] Did I hear somebody wanted to have a little play date with my Alexa-is??, 

Julia: [00:05:32] Uh, well, uh, it was, we thought about it. Um, I guess we can. 

Sam: [00:05:39] Yeah, we can set that thing up. We can, Alexa Xs, we can set something up. She would, she would not

Jo Anne: [00:05:51] Much the girl. I love 

Alicia: [00:05:53] That’s not the girl I love! 

Julia: [00:05:55] Okay. 

Sam: [00:05:56] Oh my!

Julia: [00:05:56] You know what I think…

Sam: [00:05:58] Skittles! 

Julia: [00:06:00] Yeah. I think it’s a bit of a sugar rush there. Right? Okay. Yeah. How about my son and I go over to the bench over here and we look at our, we just consult my calendar and we’ll get right back to you. Okay. 

Sam: [00:06:13] Okay. Yes, baby doll? 

Jo Anne: [00:06:17] I want to bring Mr. Sandbox man to date. 

Sam: [00:06:22] Okay, whatever you say. 

Emily: [00:06:25] Hey. Hi. 

Sam: [00:06:27] Ooh, Mr.  

Emily: [00:06:27] Here I am, dabbling in the grains, you know, they’re so fine you could put them in a necklace, write your name on them, like a piece of rice, but even smaller. 

UGUGHGHGIHGHGHGHGHGHGHGUHG! 

Jo Anne: [00:06:46] I have decided to join sandbox, man. 

Emily: [00:06:49] Good. 

Jo Anne: [00:06:52] What have you done to my mother?

Emily: [00:06:54] I paralyzed her! She’s a paralysis victim of mine. Now, 

Jo Anne: [00:07:03] Mr. Sandbox Man I  didn’t know that this was part of the scheme! 

Emily: [00:07:08] This is the sacrifice you maaaake! 

Jo Anne: [00:07:11] Ahhhh! Help me! Somebody help me!

Julia: [00:07:16] Garrett, Garrett. 

Emily: [00:07:20] What? I wasn’t doing anything. I promise. 

Julia: [00:07:22] Yeah, you weren’t…  You didn’t paralyze this poor woman and try to drag this child into the sand. 

Emily: [00:07:29] No… you know, I got needs and they are just, basically, I am…

Julia: [00:07:35] Kidnapping children is one of your needs. 

Emily: [00:07:39] Got to consume human flesh via the sand in order to sustain myself.

You know, this about me. You’ve been coming to this playground for however long, you know about me. I am The Sandbox Man. And I just like…

Jo Anne: [00:07:52] Mommy, actually Josh’s mommy. 

Julia: [00:07:55] Yes. 

Jo Anne: [00:07:56] I just pee my pants. 

Julia: [00:07:58] Perfect. 

Emily: [00:07:58] I’m out.

Jo Anne: [00:08:05] Who’s this?

Alicia: [00:08:06] That is Mr. Gooberson 

Julia: [00:08:10] My grandfather, my great grandad. He’s a sick dog. 

Emily: [00:08:16] Also your father’s lover, 

Julia: [00:08:19] That’s new information. 

Alicia: [00:08:21] That is… it was university. It was experimental. We were listening to the stones. It was frankly beautiful. Mr. Gooberson… 

Emily: [00:08:34] You know, we kinda left it loose when, uh, we went to my friend’s house that night and. 

Alicia: [00:08:41] He wasn’t leaving it loose. 

Emily: [00:08:43] Cradled my head as I vomited it into a bowl. I don’t remember how it ended. So I just assumed we’ve always been together. 

Julia: [00:08:51] Oh my God. Wait. Great grandpa. You barfed into a bowl in front of this guy? 

Emily: [00:08:56] Oh, I did a lot more than that. 

Julia: [00:08:59] It was so serious. 

Alicia: [00:09:01] Oh, we don’t need to go into details. Tammy you know I had an adventurous university time. 

Sam: [00:09:07] This is what you were talking about when you were talking about the dark ages, 

Emily: [00:09:12] Stroking… Each other gently in the night.

Alicia: [00:09:17] Yes. Not in front of, uh, my daughter, Rachel here. Who’s actually just falling in love. So if we just give them two a minute, Here, run down through the basement and throw on the Phantom tollbooth goodbye. 

Sam: [00:09:29] Oh.

Emily: [00:09:30] I’d take that !

Jo Anne: [00:09:34] James 

Julia: [00:09:35] Hey Rebecca. 

Jo Anne: [00:09:36] I didn’t know that our families were so intertwined. 

Julia: [00:09:43] I know it’s, uh, it’s just so crazy, like who knew that my granddad and your dad are, were at university at the same time.

Jo Anne: [00:09:53] Your granddad is really old.  

Julia: [00:09:56] Great. Yeah. Great granddad. Yeah. 

Jo Anne: [00:09:58] Crazy. 

Julia: [00:09:59] I mean, yeah, like romantic and like they seen each other’s insides. 

Jo Anne: [00:10:06] Yeah. 

Julia: [00:10:06] And you can make it. 

Rachel just hearing their story. I want, I want you to see me throw up. 

Jo Anne: [00:10:20] I would love to see it. 

Julia: [00:10:21] Oh my gosh. Okay. Okay. Like, I don’t know like how, cause of never like thrown up before. Cause I’m like kind of perfect. So could you show me.

Emily: [00:10:36] Great grandson, I brought you some protection just in case. Cause it seems like you’re kind of falling flat here. 

Jo Anne: [00:10:48] Is he giving you Gravol?

Emily: [00:10:52] It’s sort of like that, but it’s like rubberized. Just follow the instructions. 

Jo Anne: [00:10:58] You know what I think 

Alicia: [00:11:00] I just brought some ipecac. If you need that. 

Emily: [00:11:05] Remember to lube up. 

Jo Anne: [00:11:08] You know, what might make you barf?

Um, I actually, I actually found the, the romantic story between my dad and your great grandpa. very…. You know, they, my mom and my dad, they don’t get along. I say we break them up, get the two love birds back together. 

Julia: [00:11:31] Yeah. 

Jo Anne: [00:11:34] Maybe that’s what we do tonight instead of us dating cause you know, I’m not into someone who wants to watch me barf  I think that’s weird, 

Julia: [00:11:42] You know what? Your dad and my great granddad hook up. They’ll make us like inset to incestuous  and I would definitely hurl at that.  

Jo Anne: [00:11:52] I would rather 

thanks for listening to The Hatch. We are eggstatic that you joined us today. 

Sam: [00:12:00] If this episode cracked you up, make sure you give us an eggstra special review! 

Alicia: [00:12:06] Your ratings and reviews flip our day, sunny side up and help more comedy lovers, like you, find our podcast. 

Julia: [00:12:11] Don’t forget to subscribe and share this episode with someone who you think needs some Big Chick Energy. 

Emily: [00:12:16] And if you want to eggsplore more of our yolks, head on over to bigchickenergysketch.com and get all of our content straight to your inbox.

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